Many times, a divorcing spouse will encourage their partner to complete divorce proceedings without any legal involvement. A big risk in agreeing to this is that your spouse may be hiding money from you, and if you are none the wiser, you won't get compensated for your fair share of those assets. Divorcing individuals in Washington have been burned before, and without legal aid, the odds are even higher.
]]> Unfortunately, the IRS isn't a reliable safety net because the organization often fails to identify and address "hidden" income, mostly because the time and resources required are too great to justify the end result, in most cases. That leaves divorcing spouses on their own to cover their bases. Fortunately, there are a few warning signs that every divorcing individual should watch for.First, take stock of your spouse's current standard of living and living expenses, and compare that with his or her reported income. If the two aren't aligned with one another, something's amiss, and it could be that he or she is under-reporting income or living off finances you aren't aware of.
You are more likely to get fooled by hidden finances if you weren't the one handling the money in the first place, or if your spouse was involved in finance professionally. Self-employed individuals are a particular risk, since they can modify revenues, profits and other factors to distort their financial picture.
Regardless of whether you notice unusual financial activity, it's worth contacting a divorce lawyer. A good attorney can offer guidance on how to learn more about hidden finances and protect you from getting swindled in the divorce settlement.
Source: Huffington Post, "Signs That Your Soon-to-be-Ex May Be a Secret Cash Stasher," May 16, 2012
]]>After going out to their Mother's Day brunches, many women in Clark County sat down to write checks for spousal support or child support.
]]> Although many people think of men as the breadwinners and women as the homemakers, the tides are turning, and an increasing number of women are responsible for providing financial support for their families, even after divorce.As women have gained footing in the workplace, many are willing to work hard to achieve a high level of professional success. As they spend more time in the office, their husbands are often left to spend time with the kids. If the father is the primary caretaker when the couple files for divorce, he may receive primary custody. Likewise, if he made sacrifices in his career to support the advancement of her career, he may receive spousal support payments.
According to a recent study from the American Academy of Matrimonial Lawyers, 56 percent of divorce attorneys have seen an increase in the number of mothers who are responsible for paying child support. Of those same family law attorneys, 47 percent have also seen an increase in the number of women who are responsible for paying alimony.
Source: Huffington Post, "This Mother's Day, More Moms Paying Child Support," Ken Altshuler, May 12, 2012
]]>For starters, the challenge of re-establishing one's life after a divorce takes many forms, including financial, social and emotional. Spouses who were once looking fondly toward retirement may now be forced to put those plans on hold in order to rebuild financial security. Washington divorcees may also have to find new friends outside of the ones they've shared with their former spouse for decades.
]]> Many individuals who have recently gone through a divorce can greatly benefit from having a support system around them. The most tangible of these support structures is a financial expert who can provide insight into your exact financial situation, give clear feedback on what you can expect, and help you plan out a successful future.It's also important to identify friends and family members you can lean on during these tough times. Parents, siblings, children and friends who you don't need to share with your ex can all help you process your emotions and arrive at a comfortable place.
The other important consideration is to remember that comfort and happiness take time to achieve. Don't rush yourself, and don't go hard on yourself if you struggle to adapt to a divorce. If you have been married for decades, it is going to take a while to learn how to function at your best as a single person.
Source: Huffington Post, "Divorce Over 50," MaryEllen Linnehan, May 7, 2012
]]>One of the best examples in Clark County is health insurance. Once a couple's divorce is finalized, only one spouse can stay on the insurance policy. Although the children can stay on the policy, the other spouse needs to find new coverage quickly.
If you are the spouse who needs to find a new insurance plan, it can be helpful to know that there are a few options.
]]> First, if you work at a company that offers health insurance benefits, you may want to sign up for that coverage. However, if you have been a stay-at-home parent or if your job does not offer health benefits, there are other options.Once your divorce is finalized, you can qualify for COBRA coverage. Although COBRA will offer immediate coverage, you should still look for another plan. COBRA coverage only lasts 36 months. More importantly, if you develop a health condition while you're receiving coverage from COBRA, it may be difficult to find a new provider. If you do find a new plan, it will likely be accompanied by high premiums.
If you do not have another permanent health insurance plan lined up, it's a good idea for your kids to stay on your spouse's plan. However, during the divorce, you should talk about who will be responsible for paying the premiums. Your divorce attorney may have suggestions about a fair way to divide the payments in your situation.
Source: Huffington Post, "Divorce Questions: Can I Still Get Medical Insurance From My Ex After Divorce?" Jeffrey A. Landers, May 7, 2012
]]>Unfortunately, if individuals if Clark County don't feel compelled to share their financial details during marriage, they often don't feel compelled to share them during divorce. In many situations, that can lead one spouse to hide assets in an attempt to game the system and keep more money during the divorce.
Although people may think they're being stealthy by deleting emails or clearing a computer's history, technology makes it constantly easier to uncover hidden assets.
]]> It seems like each person has his or her own method of hiding assets in a secretive way. Some people stick cash in a safety deposit box. Other people use a secret email account to communicate with a financial advisor to send money to a secret online brokerage account. Others only send text messages about their finances from a password-blocked cellphone.Those moves may be enough to confuse a spouse, but it's likely not enough to stop the investigative eye of a family law attorney or a technology expert. Years ago, attorneys may have spent hours or days pouring through bank statements to find a transaction that seemed out of place. Today, advanced search technology makes it possible to scan thousands of online statements in a matter of seconds.
If you think your spouse is hiding assets, it's important to contact an experienced family law attorney. Your anger may tempt you to hack into a cellphone or browse through your spouse's computer history. However, evidence that is obtained illegally is usually not admissible in court. An experienced attorney could help ensure that all the information you collect can be used effectively.
Source: Wall Street Journal, "Why Hiding Money From Your Spouse Has Gotten a Lot Harder," Veronica Dagher, April 30, 2012
]]>Many divorcing spouses fail to fully realize how a divorce will affect their routine and their parenting, regardless of what type of child custody arrangement is made. The process of choosing a custody arrangement is hard enough on its own, but it gets more complicated when your decision is brought to your soon-to-be ex, as well as in front of a family court judge.
]]> While sole custody can provide more freedom to the parent, making it easier for them to make decisions for the family without consulting the other parent, it isn't always the best one for the children. That, ultimately, is the most important consideration of the court. A judge will try to determine your motives for seeking sole custody, whether they are warranted -- for example, if you are trying to protect your child from harm's way -- or if you are merely being vindictive and combative.Parents should understand that sole custody isn't the only option, and giving up full-time parenting doesn't mean you will lose your children. Split custody, joint custody and other parenting arrangements can provide flexibility to both sides without compromising the upbringing of the children and their ability to develop relationships with both parents.
And while the sole custodial parent has traditionally had more time with their children, that trend is changing, showing that joint custody can provide more parenting time.
Ultimately, the decision is one that must be reached and agreed to by all parties, including the judge. In most cases, the best situation is one that provides the greatest amount of parenting time for both parents. Whatever the arrangement, it will be one made in the best interests of the children, not the parents.
Source: Huffington Post, "How To Divorce: How Can I Get Full Custody Of The Kids?" May 1, 2012
]]>College is expensive, and neither tuition nor interest rates are going down. Work closely with your attorney to make sure you have a clear plan about college-related expenses. Before you begin the process, here are a few things to keep in mind.
]]> The year before your student applies for college, the parent with the lower income should have primary custody of your student and should claim the corresponding the tax deduction. This can help allow your student qualify for more financial aid.When your student is applying for financial aid, it is critical that you and your ex fully disclose your financial information. FAFSA and CSS Profile rely on timely and accurate information, so being honest about your finances is another way to help ensure your student maximizes available aid.
Your divorce decree should also have specific language regarding who will be expected to pay for your student's expenses. Clearly dictate who will pay for room and board, tuition, and books. In addition, you should also talk about who will pay for expenses that arise before college starts, including standardized tests, prep courses and application fees.
Finally, if there is an upper limit to your financial support, spell that out as well. Are you willing to pay anything necessary for your student to get a degree? If there is an upper limit, be clear about it. For example, you might specify that you're willing to pay for 50 percent of the expenses for four years of schooling, up to a maximum of $25,000 a year.
Ultimately, it's up to you and your ex to determine how much each of you will pay for your student's education. However, making those decisions preemptively can help eliminate fights down the road.
Source: Huffington Post, "Divorce Questions: How Is College Tuition Divided Among Exes?" Honoree Corder, April 17, 2012
]]>Divorcing couples in Washington have much to learn from the trials and tribulations of celebrity divorces. The way they handle themselves is subject to far greater scrutiny than what non-famous divorcing couples may face, so they often need to be more intentional with their actions. If you are facing a split, take your cues from the celebrities and position yourself for an easier divorce.
]]> First, don't be afraid to compromise. Some celebrities are so financially comfortable that very little work goes in to the division of assets. It's okay to let others know that things between you and your ex are amicable, even if you're going through a divorce.Along those same lines, knowing when not to talk can be just as important as making sure certain things are said. This is the best rule of thumb for couples going through a bitter divorce. Not only does keeping quiet about sensitive subjects make you look better to your peers, but it can also help you in a divorce case -- particularly if your spouse is losing his or her cool.
Finally, make sure your focus is on the kids. Having kids makes a divorce much more complicated, but it also demands that parents put their own interests on the back burner. Make sure your children understand that they are still loved by both parents, and that you are both still there for them even though you are splitting up.
Source: Huffington Post, "Celebrity Divorces: How To Handles A Hollywood Breakup," Jo Piazza, April 23, 2012
]]>It doesn't matter if you think your privacy settings will prevent your soon-to-be ex-spouse from seeing what you post. Anything you post online may be viewed by your ex and the opposing counsel during your divorce. Not only could the information you post be viewed by unintended parties, but it could also be used against you.
]]> Information found on social media sites has been a key part of nearly 700 cases since 2010. So what are attorneys and judges looking for when they troll your accounts? Social media profiles can be used to reveal four main things about an individual:For example, if you are in the middle of a child custody battle, and you post something that suggests you are mentally unfit to be a parent, that information could jeopardize your parenting rights. Likewise, if you insist that you do not use drugs or alcohol, but post pictures of you partying, that could also be used against you.
Don't worry, there are things you can do to help ensure social media information is not used against you. Many divorce lawyers suggest deactivating your social media accounts while you are working through your divorce.
Source: All Twitter, "How Do Family Law Attorneys Use Social Media For Evidence? [INFOGRAPHIC]," Lauren Dugan, April 10, 2012
]]>These laws account for virtual visitation rights within a parenting plan that is outlined in a divorce settlement. Virtual visitation can include e-mail, texting and access on social media sites such as Facebook. It also includes video chatting programs, such as Skype.
]]> While the economic realities often force one parent to relocate to another area, these virtual visitation options can help parents maintain strong bonds and emotional relationships with their children.Experts agree that these virtual visitation sessions cannot substitute for those important face-to-face times, such as special holidays and vacations. However, they provide a wonderful way for parents to continue to "see" and interact with their children on a regular basis.
It can lessen the pain of a divorce for the child as well as the parent who does not have primary custody. Virtual visitation options are something that all parents should keep in mind when working with a divorce lawyer and judge in order to come up with a parenting plan for their children throughout their formative years.
Source: The Washington Times, "Virtual visitation: a sensible child custody option," Myra Fleisher, April 15, 2012
]]>The bill, known as the Servicemember Family Protection Act, is being supported by the House Armed Services Committee and would prevent family court judges from using past or future deployments as a judge's sole criteria for making a decision in a child custody case.
If passed, the bill could have a landmark effect on divorce and child custody cases in Washington and across the nation.
]]> Although deployments could still play a role in the decision-making process, other factors would have to be considered as well, providing better odds to military servicemembers seeking to retain custody of their children while fulfilling their duties for the military.Supporters of the bill note that it does not create an advantage to servicemembers seeking child custody. It does, however, remove a disadvantage that has long hampered the child custody efforts of military personnel.
Members of the military are subject to being relocated to any part of the world at any time during their service, exposing them to potentially long absences from home. Previously, such circumstances could automatically disqualify a person from maintaining custody of their children.
The bill was first introduced in 2008 and was passed by the House of Representatives, but it failed to gain support in the Senate. In every subsequent year, the bill has suffered the same result.
Now committee members are hoping that the United States Defense Secretary, Leon Panetta, will throw his support behind the bill in an effort to sway U.S. Senators. The former Defense Secretary, Robert Gates, had supported the bill but did so too late in the process to have any notable impression on voters.
Source: Military.com, "Law Would Strengthen Troops' Child Custody Rights," Charlie Reed, Stars and Stripes, April 10, 2012
]]>According to a recent article from Reuters, thinking about Batman could be what it takes for people in Clark County to get through the divorce process efficiently. Don't worry, you don't need a Batmobile or a bulletproof costume to get through the divorce process. Instead, try to think like Batman.
]]> Unlike the other superheroes created by DC and Marvel, Batman has no superpowers. However, he manages to outsmart the Joker and the other villains in Gotham by outsmarting them. By thinking ahead and planning for every possible scenario, Batman is able to stay ahead of his competition.You should do the same thing if you're thinking about divorce or if you recently filed for divorce. Before you file for divorce, talk to an experienced family law attorney and take the time to learn about Washington's divorce laws. Is there a chance you'll be expected to pay spousal support? What will happen with your property? How will the family business be divided? No attorney could guarantee an outcome for your situation, but having a better understanding for all the possible outcomes can help guarantee you're ready for anything.
Another thing that helps with preparation are prenuptial and post-nuptial agreements. If you're engaged, consider writing a prenuptial agreement. If you're happily married and don't have an agreement, consider working with an attorney to write a post-nuptial agreement.
Whether you're suggesting a post-nuptial or a divorce, remember to be calm and honest when you're talking with your spouse. If you're suggesting a post-nuptial, explain why it's important to have a plan for the business. If you're interested in getting divorce, have honest conversations about what each of you expects from the family business moving forward.
Most importantly, as you are working through the process, remember that Batman never aims to kill his opponents. Likewise, being unnecessarily mean or rude to your spouse, or reacting with a short temper will only hurt your situation.
Think like Batman: Plan ahead. Be prepared. Be honest, and stay calm.
Source: Reuters, "Want To Protect Your Business in a Divorce? Be Batman," Edward Tan, JD, April 5, 2012
]]>When one of the parents is suffering from problems like depression or alcoholism, their failure to parent in a healthy manner can put the children at risk of developmental disorders -- even if the other parent is practicing healthy parenting habits. Parents in Washington and across the country are coming to realize more and more often that patience, communication and empathy are essential for co-parenting and raising healthy children.
The following are some do's and don'ts of co-parenting that can provide a useful guide to newly divorced parents. Although the tips aren't comprehensive, they are an excellent starting point to raising healthy, balanced children.
]]> DO establish open dialogue with your former spouse. However you choose to communicate, it is important that you are on the same page with one another. This means creating schedules together as well as agreeing upon rules and routines.DO establish consistent behavioral guidelines for your children. Children who are forced to acclimate to different behavioral standards depending on the day of the week face a much higher risk of developmental problems.
DO embrace routine with your children. Going to the mall, to the park and on vacations is fun, but research shows that children need to experience the mundane routines of life with their parents just as much as they need play time.
DON'T drag your children into the middle of conflicts with your ex-spouse. This fosters insecurity in your kids as well as feelings of helplessness. Do not talk to your kids about any conflict, and do not bad-mouth your ex-spouse to your kids. Present a calm, stable front at all times.
DON'T let guilt be a motivator. Divorced parents often feel guilty, among a range of other emotions, and this can lead to overstepping boundaries in an effort to compensate with your children. But this is an unnecessary step, and it can hurt your child's development, particularly in regards to how they experience empathy.
DON'T accuse your former spouse of doing some wrong. Always approach any situation, even a potentially tense one, by being calm and open to discussion. Make sure the conversation is framed as being in the best interests of the children -- not as an attempt by you to attack the other parent.
Source: Psychology Today, "The Do's and Don'ts of Co-Parenting Well," Deborah Serani, Psy. D., March 28, 2012
]]>But more and more often, men in Washington and elsewhere in the country are walking out of court rooms with partial and, in some cases, full custody of their children. The increasingly leveled field between men and women means little things can make a big difference. To position yourself well in a child custody case, there are a number of things you can do to keep your case free of smudges.
]]> Although it may seem obvious, refraining from yelling at your spouse is of dire importance. Losing your temper and yelling at your spouse gives your opposition ammunition with which they can frame you as angry, unstable and unfit to care for your children. If there is a perceived risk of violence, it could be crippling to your case. Maintain appearances and be polite at all times, regardless of the circumstances.In addition to not yelling at your ex-spouse, you should also avoid criticizing them, either to your friends or your family. Friends that were shared with your spouse during the marriage may not always have your back, and you need to be wary of the risk of your criticisms finding their way into the court room. You should always assume that what you say will make it back to your former spouse.
Part of maintaining civility between yourself and your ex-spouse is not interfering with their time with the kids. Not only could this paint you as controlling and vindictive, but it's also unhealthy for your children.
Similarly unhealthy for children is moving in with a significant other too early. As long as divorce proceedings are ongoing, don't start to cohabitate. Judges will take this as a sign of instability that could be detrimental to the children, and it could hurt your case considerably.
Finally, don't pull out any surprises, especially when it entails taking your children outside of the agreed-upon area. In the worst-case scenario, this could be construed as kidnapping and put you in trouble with the law. If you do need to take the kids somewhere on an emergency, talk to your spouse beforehand, and if you can, talk to the judge as well.
Source: Huffington Post, "Ways To Sabotage Child Custody," Joseph E. Cordell, April 2, 2012
]]>In the coming weeks, thousands of miles away from Vancouver, Washington, the U.S. Senate will consider reauthorizing VAWA. Although the landmark law was reauthorized in 2000 and 2005 by virtually unanimous bipartisan votes, changes added to expand the law's power this time around have met with some resistance in the Senate Judiciary Committee.
]]> Among those changes are measures to prevent discrimination against victims of domestic violence based on sexual orientation or gender, expand the jurisdiction of tribal courts over abusers with significant tribal ties (in some cases) and enable law enforcement officers to ask for visas for immigrant victims who are aiding their investigations. Each of these proposed expansions of VAWA's power was developed with input from a national cross-section of professionals who work on domestic violence and sexual violence issues.Opponents have proposed an alternative bill that eliminates the first two of those provisions while replacing the proposed immigration provisions with new provisions targeting marriage fraud and other types of fraud as well. They also say that in reality, "there is no concern that (VAWA) will go away."
Sen. Patrick Leahy and Sen. Mike Crapo introduced the reauthorization bill, which now has 60 co-sponsors in the Senate, have said they are open to discussing amendments with other senators.
Source: USA Today, "Leahy pushes reauthorization of domestic violence bill," Nicole Gaudiano, March 29, 2012
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